my adventure towards becoming an adult, or something like that.

In an attempt to justify my excel using issues I told the person who was helping me that I use Mac, he responded through his thick Romanian accent with, “I can tell; I use Linux”.

No matter how hard you try to control your personal brand you can’t control all aspects of it.  Two major things which influence how others think of you are who you surround yourself with and what you do with your free time.  You can control what you do and who you are around but you can’t control how others perceive those choices.

The People You Surround Yourself With
My grandfather frequently tells me “you can’t soar with the eagles if you hang out with the turkeys.” Guilt by association is not just a legal term anymore.  Everyone has experience this, be it at a bar trying to pick someone up until your friend embarrasses you or in school when you have an older sibling who wasn’t the best student and you end up with the same teacher as them. My friend Kristin and I, both straight, were walking around the MN Pride Festival together at a scrimmage for the Minneapolis mens Rugby team Mayhem and people assumed that we were dating because we were there together, just walking next to each other.

Dan Schwabel recently wrote a post about how your friends impact your personal brand also.

What you do with your free time
What is the first thing that comes into your mind when I mentioned Dungeons and Dragons, or Renaissance Fair?  Or, if you’re young enough, Magic.  Harry Potter also brings some stereotypical images to a lot of peoples minds.  I had a group of friends in high school who took a limo to the Harry Potter party and Barnes and Noble.  If someone only sees what you do in your free time, or that is all they have heard about you, they might think about you in a different light then you really are.  Kevin Rose plays D&D and he is nothing like my dad who was a pot head an use to play.

I played Rugby which is a sport synonymous with lesbians for many people.  Only three of our twenty-two players were gay, but mentioning that I play Rugby almost always prompted the follow up question of if I was straight.

Another long run stereotype is which operating system you use.
Mac users and PC users are two very common stereotypes.  I personally use both because SolidWorks does not run on the Mac OS, yet.  You can even learn how to ‘dress like a Mac’ emulating the fashion displayed by Justin Long in various Mac commercials.  PC magazine has fired back with articles blasting Mac’s commercials as desperate and insulting and The Register posted an article criticizing Mac’s ‘real people’ ad campaign claimed that they feature a “collection of life’s losers”.  Choosing an operating system based on any criteria you want, but you will automatically be drafted to the virtual war.  You could also opt out an use Linux.  Zamir, one of the smartest people I know, support Ubuntu.

I almost titled this post If I am murdered my neighbor did it because that is how I am left feeling every time I have a ‘confrontation’ with my current neighbor.

My roommates and I inhabit the second and third floor apartment of a house, he is our downstairs neighbor.

There were no problems between us until about a month ago when our landlord told him that he would not allow for him to resign his lease.  I am not sure if our landlord blamed us or what went on between them but we are receiving the force of the neighbors anger.

It is hard to deal with someone who is irrational without the situation escalating but I feel that I have learned some valuable skills from first hand encounters that I would like to share them with you.

The goal of these following steps is to dissipate the situation.

1. Don’t argue with the person.  If the person is really upset chances are they will not be willing to see your point of view.  Apologize for the situation and state how you will work to resolve it.  Example, when the neighbor rang the door bell at 12:15 am telling us our television was to loud when we didn’t even have it on and we had previously been waken by him moving furniture around in the middle of the night.  We simply said that we would watch the volume on it and he left promptly.
2. Stay calm.  If you are experience the equivalent to an adult temper tantrum you getting upset and angry will only entice the situation and make the person become defensive.   Example, when the neighbor took my parking space at mid day (meaning I’d have to park a good couple miles away and walk back to the apartment) and started yelling at me that he wanted the spot the moment I pulled into the drive way.  In fear of him throwing a tire iron through my window I decided to run errands.  He is banned by the landlord from parking in our lot because he parks like a jackass and takes up two spots.
3. If a confrontation becomes eminent walk away; not only will the situation stop from becoming out of hand you will look like the bigger person.  Example, when two of my roommates returned from the bar at 2 am and were on the porch talking so quietly that we could not hear them 15 feet away and he came out yelling at them to shut up and woke our entire house and the three neighbors up by yelling, “you guys are assholes and I’m calling the cops.”  My roommates went inside as he stood outside swearing at the empty porch until the cops came because a neighbor called them on him.
4. Contact someone involved who can better handle the situation.  Example, we contacted our landlord in a letter to inform him of our concerns.  Even though our landlord may have caused the hostility if the situation ever escalates to someone being taken to jail there is proof that we have had him harassing us in the past.

Also, a little side note, if the police do become involved make sure that you get a copy of the police report so you can make sure all information is accurate.

In summary, don’t argue, stay calm, walk away, and contact someone who can better alleviate the problem.

My high school marketing teacher is retiring this year so last time I was home I stopped into see him.  The walls of the main hallway were plastered with logos from various colleges, and below them the names of each graduating senior who would be attending next year.  I remember when I was a senior the students who weren’t going to college or tech school carried a stigma of sorts, because the first question to come after finding this out was always, “well, what are you going to do then?”  Some students were going straight into the workforce, a few were knocked up, a couple were enlisting, and one was spending a year with the Peace Corps.

Senior year of college is met with the same situation.  There is no big wall listing major companies and who is going to become their cubicle slave, but students can be heard between classes telling their friends and professors about their signing bonuses and company cars they will be driving, or the flight out to be interviewed.  Students who don’t have a job lined up seemed to be treated with that same stigma as a high school senior who isn’t going to college.  I hear people referencing the high turnover rate of our generation and how many people start their own companies and do a phenomenal job, but what about those students who trouble from the get-go?

My future business partner and someone whom I have always looked up to didn’t have a job lined before graduation, and I think she is the most employable of anyone I went to college with.  Another friend postponed graduation a semester because she had no job lined up and no idea of what she wanted to do after college.  She had no direction, so instead of finding some she deferred it.  When chances are within three years you will be working for a different company how to decide what to do, how do you find that direction?

If you can’t decided on the job you want think about the lifestyle.

Do you want to be able to be home a lot?  Maybe consider a job where you can work from home, or work at a place close to home.
Do you want to live on the East/West coast?  If you know that you want to be in your hometown move there and find a job.
Do you want a job which allows you to travel?  If you want to travel for free try getting employment with a foreign exchange company.
Are you willing to give up having a weekend which starts Thursday night? If not, find a job where you can work Mon.-Thurs.
Is it important for you to be able to meet new people frequently? Get your bar-tending license.

If you know how you want to live start there and find a job which will allow you to have that lifestyle.

There is one trait that all successful people share; self discipline.     Without self discipline one is as successful as a company whose business plan is formulated just to sit on a dusty shelf awaiting the annual meeting when it is dusted off and sits on a table for a couple hours.  Self discipline is why to-do lists work, deadlines are met, and progress is made.

But how does one develop self discipline?

Don’t quit.  As Jerry Rice said, “once you get into the mode of quitting, then you feel like it’s okay.”
Plan, and stick to it.  Planning is a great way to not only lay out and allow one to visualize goals, long term and short, it is also a great way to track the progress you have made.
Set a time goal for tasks.  Parkinson’s Law tells us that work expands to fill the time available for its completion.  Time goals force oneself to complete the task at hand and not put it off.
Focus on the quality of job done, not the timeliness.  John C. Maxell suggests that, “next time you’re facing a must-do task and you’re thinking of doing what’s convenient instead of paying the price, change your focus.  Count the benefits of doing what’s right, then dive in”.  Just like one can fall into the habit of quitting one can fall into the habit of doing subpar work.  To quote my grandpa, “half ass work just creates more work” and it is a bad habit to fall into.
Evaluate excuses.  Many times most effort is put into making excuses to get out of doing a task then the task actually requires.  Focus on the benefits of completing the task and do it.  After it is complete one can take pride in crossing it off of the to-do list.  (If it isn’t on any to do list write it down and cross it off, it feels good)
Do the most dreaded task first.  In many cases these tasks are not as tedious or horrible as they may appear it can make the to-do list most appealing to see them crossed off and possibly instill pride in oneself that the dreaded task was completed.
Develop routines and positive habits.  If drinking a cup of coffee has already became habit use the time to evaluate the previous days to-do list and create one for the day.  Having a routine helps develop self discipline which can translate into other areas of ones life (work).  It is easier to stick to something if it is already habit.
When feeling overwhelmed or discouraged focus on the end result, not the current difficulties.

Talent without discipline is like an octopus on roller skates. There’s plenty of movement, but you never know if it’s going to be forward, backwards, or sideways.
-H. Jackson Brown Jr.

50% of employers expect a college graduate to have completed an internship, of that 20% expect a college graduate to have completed two internships.

Companies don’t participate in internships programs to feel like they are being socially conscious, they participate in internship programs because it is one of the best recruiting tools available. Internships are like a test run of potential employees, allowing a company to decided if this is someone which we want to be a part of our team, and if it is worth investing in them.

I participated in what I consider to have been a highly beneficial and successful internship (I was hired full time and allowed to take a sabbatical to finish school).  I learned a lot from my fellow interns on what to do, and more on what not to do.

Don’t worry about what others are doing. Many of my fellow interns would show up to work ten or fifteen minutes late, take extended lunch breaks, and leave early.  They believed that because of their internship title they were immune from any actual responsibility and could not be fired.  Treat your internship opportunity like it is a job, because it is.

If you are being paid to much to sweep a floor then you need a pay cut. Being an intern really isn’t glamorous for most.  Coming into the workplace interns are lowest on the totem pole and tend to have the most menial and tedious tasks, like measuring sprocket diameters for two weeks.  No one wants to do this, and chances are your coworkers will know that.  While many people would like to see the concept of ‘paying dues’ vanish the truth is that most people still follow it and complaining about the work you are doing is not going to change this, it will only irritate your coworkers.  Completing work which no one else wants to do, and doing it with a smile on your face will leave a positive impression.

Dress like the position you want. Our company had a vary lax dress code, but when it came to important meetings a majority of the interns would show up in jeans and dirty t-shirts while the rest of the department would be in proper attire.  One intern told me that everyone knows we are interns so they don’t expect us to dress up, and it isn’t important to our job anyway.

What is that dohicer by the googlie gears? As an Intern you are expected to not know everything. Recruiters look for interns who can be molded and developed into exemplary employees.  Companies expect interns to need help, guidance, and training;  all of which they are (generally) more then willing to provide if they feel that it will be worth their investment.  Don’t be ashamed to ask for clarification or assistance.

Want to babysit? Occasionally interns will be asked to partake in activities such as career fairs, professional development seminars, facilitating a group of customers or dealers which will be at the company.  These are all fantastic networking and development events.  While many older coworkers may express their discontentedness about these activities if they are required to be involved with them, they are not in the same boat as you.  While it may not benefit them at all it may benefit you.  I was assigned to ‘babysit’ some visitors one day and I ended up learning more about our machinery and development then I could have ever learned from listening to a lecturer or reading about it.

I worked with the students who made me understand why people call us generation me, or the entitled generation.  If you view your internship with humility, that it is a fantastic opportunity that you are lucky to have, and you utilize it there is no way that you wont take something from it.  Internships are a companies first look at you, and how you behave on them will be what they remember if you apply to work for them in the future.